Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
