no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Quick, to the slutcave!
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
