"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Randomize