SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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