...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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