sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I checked into jail on foursquare
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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