I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Randomize
