Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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