I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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