So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize