so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
too bad you live with your parents still
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
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