YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
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