i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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