I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
