i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Randomize
