I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
