He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
