they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize