were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
