They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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