no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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