yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
