Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Randomize
