I accidentally burped into my bong.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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