My Higher Power is John Stamos
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
My vagina is very pro this idea
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