I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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