The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
Farmville is her only friend.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
