Can Purell be used as lube?
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
i believe in u and ur pee
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