Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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