HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
