do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
