THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
