well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize
