let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
