It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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