whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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