i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
He kissed a someone with a penis
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize