My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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