After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize