what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Blow job season was short but glorious.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize