I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Randomize
