he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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