Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
