You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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