I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize