btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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