A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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