I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
