she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
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And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
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I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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