she takes plan B like it's going out of style
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize